Now in society, we have heard some people may say: “being kind is a weakness”. “The people who become kind to others are weak.” We are going to find out how to be kind without being weak.
First of all, we need to know that kindness itself is not a weakness. Kindness is a virtue. It is a great quality that you can have in your mind. But people consider those who become kind to others, who are very compassionate, weak. But that is not the reality. How can you be kind without being weak? In a wonderful discourse of the Supreme Buddha’s teachings, it says if you can maintain your patience when you are more powerful than the other person if you can maintain your inner peace, when someone complains you or someone hurts you, even though you are more powerful than that person. That is the greatest patience that you can have in your life. Being patient, being silent doesn’t define you as weak.
You should not go to the side of negativity. It means you should not be patient out of fear. Also, you should not go to the side of aggressiveness. That means you should not be aggressive to others. Instead, you can be assertive. What does it mean in practice? Assertiveness means being kind and maintaining your inner peace without being aggressive. And still you can be confident. If you can be confident as well as kind, that is what you call assertiveness. When you are kind to other people, that does not mean that you are weak. What you have to do when you become kind, you have to be wise. Kindness mixed with wisdom is the best kindness.
What if those evil people or toxic people come to you and start hurting you again and again? You have to take yourself back. Stay away from those people. You should not fall into the same trap again and again. Instead, you can be away from them and that is what is called assertiveness. When you become kind and wise, you become assertive. That is what real kindness is.
What is important is not to let anyone control your inner peace. Don’t let anyone change your emotions and make you sad. Instead, choose to be assertive. You should maintain your inner peace and be confident and be patient and be kind to others. But never, ever be angry and hurt others.